Reflections on Mortality: A Letter to My Children

Lessons Learned from Facing Cancer and Cherishing Family

I've been contemplating my mortality lately. There are now far more years behind me than there are ahead on my "road of life." It's a sobering thought, one that brings up questions I never expected to weigh so heavily. Will I matter to anyone once I'm gone? Will I be thought of, remembered, or missed?

Cancer has a way of clarifying things. It strips away the illusions of permanence and forces you to see what—and who—will truly stay with you. It's taught me, in stark terms, who will remember me when I'm gone. It isn't the acquaintances or the colleagues, not the people who passed through my life quickly. It's my family. It's you, my children.

Life Moves Faster Than You Think

To our kids:

Life moves faster than we can ever prepare for. Time doesn't pause to let us win every argument, land every promotion, or finish scrolling through endless feeds. The seconds slip by quietly, and often, we only notice their speed when we look back and realize how much has passed.

But your family—the people who knew you before you were anyone, before any accomplishments or failures weighed you down—we aren't asking for you to somehow stop time. We don't expect you to change its course or slow its pace.

What We Wish For You

We just want you to show up before it's too late. We hope you'll put the past behind you while you still can. The arguments, the grudges, the disappointments—they're heavy burdens, but they're not worth the precious moments you still have together.

Time, once gone, will never come again. Every day is a gift, and every opportunity to share a smile, a laugh, or a memory is irreplaceable. Cancer has forced me to face these truths head-on, but my greatest hope is that you learn them sooner—without needing the same wake-up call.

So don't wait for the perfect moment. Don't let pride or pain keep you from those who love you. Show up, be present, and cherish the time you have with your family. Because in the end, it's love and memory that matter most, and they are what will keep you alive in the hearts of those who truly know you.

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